The other day my friend called me... after the initial 'how are you', 'what are you doing' things, he suddenly asked me 'so how are your parents, are they doing fine, hope they are in good health etc etc? i said 'in fact good that you brought up this topic.. can you take care of my parents for 6 months since i need to go abroad on some urgent assignment and they have no one to take care of them?' i could make out that he was speechless for a moment.. he regained his composure or voice, whatever he lost when i said it and said 'well, i dont know.. i mean i have a small house, and it would be difficult' ... i said 'then stop expressing concern about my parents' health and their well being'.
though the above example is an extreme aspect of my cynicism, the point is, we many times express concern without being truly concerned... we simply say things because they are meant to be said as part of a polite conversation. what is the point of expressing concern when one wont even budge his little finger to help the other person... these only become meaningless soundbytes.... recently my friend's mother died... when i was speaking to him, he told me that his mother died and thats why he could not be in touch... i said 'ok' .. i could not make myself say things like 'ohh, thats so bad, sorry for that etc etc' because why should i be sorry if his mother died? plus honestly i did not feel anything since i never knew her nor knew about his equation with his mother... so it only was a piece of news to me and nothing else.... expressing concern there would be meaningless to me except as a sign of a polite gesture....
i have heard many times people saying the phrase 'ohh, thats so sad' without even a hint of sadness in their expression... in fact they continue to sip their favorite cocktail while expressing intense sorrow..... our human civilization has come to such a point where we automatically say things like robots and expressing concern is one aspect of that automation... when one is really concerned, it will show up in the face... if it just a soundbyte, rest assured that he does not give a shit.....
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Oh well, with the same logic you can dismiss many other regular expressions of acknowledgement like "Hi","Good morning", "Bon Appetit", "Have a good weekend", etc. How does it really matter to you anyway if I enjoy my meal and enjoy my sunday or not. You obviously dont give a shit.
ReplyDeletethis reminds me of a dialogue of brahmanandam from the movie athadu when some asks him "ela unnaaru andi" he replies "baagunnaanu andi, inka BP, sugar alantivi evi raaledhandi"
ReplyDeletesheshu, thats a good one.. ruchi, all i am saying is about people who express hollow concerns... i just exaggerated it a bit
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